How I handle criticism while showcasing my talent.

 

How to handle criticism



If you never want to be criticized, then do nothing! Even then, you won't avoid criticism because people will always have something to say. The greatest among men, Jesus, has been criticized. Don't ever think that you'll be exempt? I won't tell you that I'm the toughest cookie! I too have my share of criticism. I just don't allow it to consume me. At the end of the day, I know that I'm an imperfect person. I can't please everyone, and I won't be everyone's cup of tea. I wouldn't say that it's easy to shake it off and get over it when you are being criticized because every one of us has feelings, and it doesn't matter how strong we are mentally. Some things can throw us off balance. It's even more difficult to handle when it's from the persons closest to us and even ourselves.  


However,  as harsh as some criticism may sound, they aren't always meant to be destructive, and as nice as some may be they aren't always beneficial. I'm aware of instances, (destructive criticism) where an individual will deliberately criticize another person to hurt their reputation, creation, self-esteem, etc. But there are also instances where persons aren't willing to accept any form of criticism. It's either take it or leave it. This isn't healthy for anyone who wants to improve on what they are doing. 


As long as you are serving your talent to people you will face criticism. Would you prefer to hear the truth, even though your feelings may hurt, or be comforted with a lie? It doesn't always mean that people are fighting against you because they are criticizing what you are doing, and it doesn't always mean that they are on your side because they are encouraging what you are doing. You have to learn how to filter the feedback that you are getting from people. 


You'll also have to learn not to be so hard on yourself when you are criticizing your actions. Remember that you are human first and whatever your talent is you will face criticism. There's no escape! It doesn't matter how good you think you are. It doesn't matter how hard you work to sharpen your skills. You can never please everyone. Below I'll share a few examples of criticism.


Negative criticism means voicing an objection to something, only to show that it is wrong, false, mistaken, nonsensical, objectionable, or disreputable. Generally, it suggests disapproval of something or disagreement with something – it emphasizes the downsides of something. Negative criticism is also often interpreted as an attack against a person (ad hominem). That may not have been the intention, but it can be interpreted that way.


Negative criticism can affect that the people criticized feel attacked or insulted by it so that they either do not take it seriously or react badly to it. Much often depends on how much negative criticism there is, and how much criticism is transmitted at once. People can handle some negative criticism, but they may not be able to handle a whole lot of negative criticism, at least not all at once.


The downside of negative criticism is, often, that it tells people what they cannot or should not do or believe, rather than telling them what they can or should do (what possibilities or options there are). So it may be disabling, rather than enabling. People might reply to a negative criticism that "this is all very well, but I cannot do anything with it", or they might say "now what?!". Yet, negative criticism may be necessary at times, to prevent a course of action harmful to the people concerned. If people are afraid to state a negative criticism, the existing problem might get worse.


The upside of negative criticism is that it can explain what the limitations of an idea, an action, or a situation are, for the sake of being realistic. Sometimes it is necessary to say "no" to something (and explain why "no" is "no"). Reference https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Varieties_of_criticism



positive criticism draws attention to a good or positive aspect of something that is being ignored, disregarded, or overlooked. People may be able to see only the negative side of something so that it becomes necessary to highlight the positive side. A positive criticism may also be a type of self-justification or self-defense.

The term "positive criticism" is also used in the sense that the criticism is "well-meant" or "well-intentioned" ("I mean it positively"). Here, the criticism intends to serve a purpose that is constructive, or that the targeted person would approve of.


The basic aim of positive criticism is usually to provide a better orientation, or frame of reference, for behavior. It provides ideas people can act on to improve the situation. At the very least, it provides more choices for behavior, and therefore potentially enlarges behavioral freedom.

Positive criticism can be stated as a positive alternative ("there are good reasons for thinking that we are better off to do Y, instead of X"). It does not necessarily say, that the option criticized is all bad, but rather that an alternative option is better, or preferable. Reference https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Varieties_of_criticism


Self-criticism is an essential component of learning. To be able to change one's behavior, improve one's style, and adjust to a new situation, it is necessary to recognize personal errors as errors. Once the errors are known, something can be done about them; a different path can be pursued. One also needs to be able to tell the difference between success and failure, and not mistake one for the other. Only then is it possible to truly "learn from one's mistakes?" Often, the most challenging part is to know what exactly the mistake or success consists of. Self-criticism aims to find all that out, aided by memory.


People sometimes say, "it's about the criticism that gets me". This is especially true of self-criticism. Usually, people are only prepared to criticize themselves within certain limits, otherwise, it becomes confusing, disorienting, or even lethal. If a person concludes that most of what he is about is wrong, he can be plunged into disorienting chaos, where he is unable to evaluate things properly anymore. Thus, while most people regard self-criticism as healthy, as a sign of good character, and as necessary for learning, excessive or enforced self-criticism is regarded as unhealthy (as destructive for the individual). Reference https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Varieties_of_criticism


As an author, I know that everyone will not appreciate my writing, and that's fine with me. I'm also aware that my work is in the public domain and is subjected to all kinds of criticism. While I will not accept disrespect. I'm willing to hear the feedback of others because there's always room for growth and improvement. I respect the opinions of others and I do welcome their ratings. I may not agree with what they are saying, but I believe that everyone has a right to voice their opinion! I remember reading a one-star review that someone had left on one of my children's books, saying that it lacks creativity, it was simple, and there wasn't anything new that I had said that parents didn't already teach their children.


 To be honest, I took no offense to the review. It would appear as though the reader has a strong family background. I reasoned with myself, does this person understand the premise of this book? Do they understand that not all children are blessed with the opportunity to grow up in families that shower them with love and care?  Do they understand that there are children who have never heard the words I love you, from their parents or anyone else? Do they understand that many children in foster care are longing for a family to love and appreciate them? Do they understand that there are many children without parents?


 If you are an author or someone whose work is in the public domain don't feel discouraged by poor reviews, and never argue with anyone about a bad rating. Don't take them too personally. Use them as stepping stones to improve your quality of work. Remember that your viewers aren't you and there are times when their opinions make sense. Don't ignore the negative reviews that you are getting. There could be some valuable points in them. Remember, your work is nothing without people. Without readers, there would be no point in me being an author. You must be resilient in whatever industry that you are in. Serve your talent well!


Take Away

I want to remind you not to fear criticism when you are showcasing your talent. Don't let it prevent you from doing what needs to be done. Whatever you do, do it from your heart and not for men's applause. You can never control what people will say from their lips but you can control how you react. Having good intentions doesn't mean that you'll win the heart of everyone. Good intentions won't exempt you from facing harsh criticism. Not everyone will see the purpose in what you are doing. Noah was laughed to scorn when he built an ark on dry land. Everyone thought that he was crazy until the flood came. People will say all kinds of hurtful things about you and it can destroy you if you aren't focused. When I write, I know that there will be those who view my work as nothing. I know that the negativity is going to come, but that won't stop me from writing because many look forward to me empowering them through this medium, and that's enough to keep me going. 



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