Being too nice, what's the price?

Signs you're being too nice

Have you ever gotten the bitter end of things for being too nice? Has someone ever cut you out of traffic, or the supermarket line, embarrass you in public, or trifle with your emotions?

Many of us are sincerely nice human beings, and we truly want to be good citizens of the world, but what is the cost of being too nice in a relationship,  at work, to a stranger? 

"There are people who are going to expect you to always give in the extra mile, be the better one, be nice always. Those are not your people. Your people are the ones who will tell you to remove toxic individuals from your life, remove toxic friendships and relationships from your life, and break someone's car door window (and they'll help you do it too). Those are your people."
C. JoyBell C.

What's wrong with being too nice?🤔

These are commonly asked questions about being too nice:
  • Is it weird to be too nice?
  • Is being too nice toxic?
  • Is being too nice a red flag?
  • Why is being too nice a turn-off?

Here's why being too nice isn't such a good idea.

1. There are a lot of self-sacrifices. 

 We may feel as though we're doing a world of good by continuously availing ourselves for others, and doing just about anything we can to make them feel good, but it often comes with a costly price, and that price is most times self-sacrifice. 

How often do we find ourselves not having enough time and energy left to spare ourselves because we've placed ourselves on the back burner to prioritize everyone else's needs?

2. Your boundaries are trampled on.

You'll find that people will want to take advantage of you because they tend to think that you'll be okay with allowing them to do whatever they want to do. For the most part, they don't seem to care about your feelings, and you may have a hard time getting them to understand your limits.

3. They don't respect you.

Being too nice is often perceived as a sign of weakness by some people, and they aren't afraid of pushing you around. The nice guy and nice girl are often the ones who get hurt the most, and this is mainly because they don't push back or stand up for themselves. They're sometimes afraid of hurting someone else's feelings or they're afraid that they'll come off as being mean and callous and they'll no longer be seen as a nice person.

4. You're often taken for granted. 

People who are too nice have a hard time saying no. They'll go above and beyond to get things done and most times their efforts go unnoticed and unappreciated. Many people enjoy having a nice guy or nice girl around and they take advantage of this.  They'll pass on their responsibilities or share of work to the nice guy or girl because they know they can always count on them and they won't say no. 

5. You may rub people the wrong way and signal red flags.

Not everyone will warm up to the Mr nice guy and Miss nice girl type of thing. Some people don't trust anyone who's being too nice. You may come off as suspicious, and a big reason for this is that most people use this type of behavior to win the trust of others before hurting them. 

Nothing is wrong with being good to people, but if you're being overly nice you'll make some people uncomfortable. They may turn you down or question your motives. Being overly nice is sometimes seen as being pretentious, even if you're not. 

6. You sometimes feel like a bad person.

Overly nice people are often people pleasers. They sometimes feel like a horrible person when they can't help out or fall below the expectations of others.  This sometimes weighs heavily on their conscience and they often seek out ways and means to make up for their shortcomings to make themselves feel better. 

7. They don't always see how much they're hurting themselves.

Overly nice people are so used to prioritizing the needs of others that they're sometimes blinded to the fact that they're neglecting themselves.  These people don't spend much time valuing their self-care.  They give so much to others that they have very little for themselves. Overly nice people are most time left to deal with the brunt of disrespect and ungratefulness from others. 

8. It's unattractive. 

Not everyone finds being too nice an attractive characteristic. An overly nice person is sometimes seen as a pushover, who says yes to everyone and everything. Because their generosity is often exploited by those who see them as walkovers. This type of attitude is a big turnoff for some people. 

9. You can attract the wrong company. 

Overly nice people are usually targets of those who have no good intentions for them. In some cases, overly nice people can find themselves in trouble for pulling a few strings or crossing a line that they shouldn't. 

10. You'll become burnout.

Overly nice people are more likely to become burnt out from additional responsibilities or work that they take on themselves.  They're often left frustrated by the number of things that are required of them, and the low level of appreciation that is oftentimes given to them.

Final thoughts: The world needs nice people, you don't need to stop being nice to others if you are. But you must learn to strike the right balance, like everything else; too much of one thing can become good for nothing.

Thanks for reading. What's your take on being too nice? Comment below.


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