How to remain focused in uncertainties.
In 2019, I had surgery to correct a malfunctioning tendon in my ring finger. A condition called, ''Trigger Finger''. A few minutes before the surgery, I had to sign a liability waiver in case something happened during the operation. As I stared at my signature, it felt as though I had just signed my life away.
I wanted to get out as quickly as I got into the operating theatre. Mentally, it was an agonizing moment. I kept a brave face for the doctors, but inside I was slowly falling apart. The recovery period was a nightmare.
For the first few months, there were no visible signs of my left hand being able to perform its usual tasks. My fingers were swollen. I could no longer comb my hair, or perform daily chores, effectively. There were days when I felt so depressed.
Despite the challenges, I prayed and believed that one day my hand would heal. If I could relive the moment. I would have opted out of surgery and chose another option.
My hand is functioning but not the way it used to. I can still feel the effects of the surgery.
What do you do when life takes you to the edge? What do you say when you're confronted with uncertainties? Where do you turn when the answers aren't forthcoming? Below I'll share a few things that you can do when you are faced with uncertainties in life.
1. Be patient with God
We are sometimes presumptive in our prayers. We pray according to our will, and we expect God to respond according to our terms. The answer will come in time. Worrying will not change the outcome, or expedite God's timing. Be confident when you pray. Believe that God knows what's best for you. Every man has his troubles. Prayer won't stop any of us from experiencing difficulties in life, but God promises never to leave or forsake us. Trust His Timing!
2. Live one moment at a time.
Prioritize your emotional well-being. Don't focus on too many things. They will overwhelm you. They will drain your energy. Do everything in strides!
Practice daily self-care, pray, meditate, take breaks, get enough rest, eat properly, find someone helpful to talk to. Don't think that you can do it all by yourself. Whatever is bothering you, let it out! There's no shame in reaching out for help. Stay in the present.
Focus on that which is before you now. Live as though this moment is your last day on earth. You can't live for today and tomorrow. Don't use today's trouble to predict your tomorrow. No one knows what the future will bring. You only have today, do the best you can today.
3. Be realistic.
There isn't anything wrong with being positive. But we must be careful not to use our positive thoughts to escape reality. There are some situations where no amount of positivity will change the outcome. It's okay to allow yourself to feel all your emotions. Even the most uncomfortable ones. You'll have to confront them one way or the other.
Being positive all the time doesn't eliminate the adversities in life. That's one of the dangers of being overly positive. The negative emotions that you try to suppress in positivity, eventually come out. Toxic positivity can lead to serious mental health problems including denial, depression, and suicide.
You must strike the right balance. There are things in life that are beyond our control. There isn't anything that we can do about them. Know what your limits are. Set healthy boundaries. Focus on the things that you can control. Don't worry about what you cannot change.
4. Where there's life, there's hope
There are opportunities in every difficulty that we face in life. Many times we focus on what we've lost and forget that which we still have. I remember how hopeless we felt went we lost our home and livestock to hurricane Ivan in 2004. My family and I had to seek out refuge at our grandmother's house. We lost all our valuables in one night. Everything we had worked our entire lives for was either destroyed permanently or covered in debris.
It was the most devastating experience I'd encountered. We saw no sign of a future. Yet, amid our distress. There was still hope. We had our lives. My parents and four brothers were alive. Thankfully, none of our lives were lost.
There are great lessons to be learned in seasons of distress. Life can change in a split second. Ivan taught me that material goods are replaceable, but life is a precious gift. As long as there's life, there's hope.
5. Avoid the company of negative people.
Some people are more curious than helpful. They have no genuine concern about what's happening. You don't need to be in the company of anyone who is constantly a reminder of how bad a situation is. You don't need anyone who'll break your spirit. Surround yourself with those who have an understanding of what you're going through. Those who will empower you. Those who truly have your best interest at heart.
6. Go easy on yourself.
Don't be too hard on yourself. You are human like everyone else. Life has its ups and downs. There isn't anyone who's always winning. You can do so much and no more! We all have our nail-biting moments. Life is filled with uncertainties. Whatever yours may be, I pray that you'll never lose focus. Remember all those times when you were victorious. This time is no different. You'll come out stronger than ever. God is right there with you. You've got this!
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